David’s May Day To Remember

Welcome to the May edition of the News in Review poetry series. Once again I tried to stuff as much into it as I possibly could. Unfortunately, I can’t include everything. A lot happens in a month, and so there was far more to going on than I had space to fit in this piece. But I have tried to include a balance of the good, the bad, the ugly, and the fun. For once, the stand out news was something joyful! May saw the 100th birthday of Sir David Attenborough. A man so incredible that he has surpassed the status of national treasure, and become instead a universal treasure. Happy Birthday Sir David! Though of course, it wasn’t all good news in May. I hope the rest of the piece doesn’t bring you down too much.

I will add a disclaimer that this piece was written by me; a British poet, and as such will be recording and commenting from news in a British perspective, which might mean some events you consider important from May 2026 are not included, and some things you have never heard of are more extensively covered.

100th Birthdays Come Once in a Blue Moon

I’d like to start by saying 
Happy birthday  
To a man who’s more worthy 
Of living a century 
Than anybody. 
Congratulations to the legendary 
Sir David Attenborough. 

Shame the rest of the month was  
Horror! 
Panic! 
The headlines from the Atlantic 
As three people die 
From one disease. 
A virus on a cruise ship 
That poses almost no risk 
But tabloids try to make out 
It’s the plague. 
Yet an outbreak 
Of Ebola 
In Africa 
Doesn’t seem to shake them 
Though the death toll’s confirmed 
Over twenty times more. 

Trump is still at war 
But not with disease, 
He seems allergic to peace 
As talks cease 
Then start 
Then cease 
Neither side willing to decrease 
Their demands 
Operation Freedom is planned 
To take the strait by force 
Till Trump changes course 
Back to monotonous talks, 
Then suddenly withdraws 
5000 troops from Gemany 
To punish their audacity 
For not joining in. 
 
That’s another win 
For Putin. 
Who spent victory day accusing 
Zelensky of refusing 
A ceasefire he’d already broken. 
Sending missiles to acompany 
the treaty 
And accidentally  
Hitting Romania 

Football mania  
Ripples through France 
As PSG win their dance 
With Arsenal 
In the Champion’s Legue final 
Police have their hands full 
In  Paris, as riots break out. 

Labour’s leadership‘s in doubt 
As they lose clout 
In local elections 
Overtaken by inserrections 
From Paid and the SNP, 
Reform hold off Zack Polanski, 
Pushing back the Green party, 
Burnham’s backed for candidacy 
To become a labour MP, 
And Streeting resigns as health secratary 
To start a leadership race 
Stamer, completely disgraced 
Will not leave willingly. 

Bad news for ferrari 
Whose brand new EV 
Sees stock prices fall, 
The rich don’t care at all 
About the environment 

The Cerne Abbas Giant 
Gets a new paint job 
To touch up It’s enormous …. Figure 
Three years earlier 
Than expected 
The landmark was adversely affected 
By climate change. 

We’ve all felt that strain 
As heat rose 
And records broke 
The hottest May 
For three days 
In a row. 
Where did Spring go? 
And yes, it’s hypocritical, 
In a few weeks I’ll be miserable 
When it’s raining 
And it’s cold 
And it’s July 
But still, can someone 
Please just tell me why 
The summer came so soon? 
It was Thirty five degrees, 
And it wasn’t even June! 
Yet, idiots still find ways to deny… 

Streetlamps now come with A.I. 
(Global warming… Wonder why…) 
In a trial set inside 
Nigeria 
Ofcom finds, once more, 
That social media 
Is not safe for children. 
The Bluebird flies once again 
On Coniston water 
And Mary Berry has won a BAFTA 

King Charles stopped off in Bermuda 
On his way back from america 
Launched a new space program there 
And carried on his trip, 
To visit Northern Ireland 
The journey didn’t go as planned 
When local seagulls took a stand 
And covered him in shit. 

Bulgaria proved a hit 
In Eurovision 
Israel caused derision 
In the competition 
With boos during their rendition, 
But Bangaranga beat them in the end 

Sturgeon struggles to defend 
Her decisions, as her ex is found guilty 
Of stealing from the SNP. 
Whilst he admits embezzling, 
She claims she didn’t know a thing 
her husband did,  
Not easy to believe. 

Ghana bans LGBT 
Not acts, but the identity 
With sentences of up to three 
years for the offence.. 

Taiwan claims independance 
Not formally, but in response 
To Trumps insistance 
That they shouldn’t do 

Israel threatens to sue 
The Washington Post 
As Netenyahu 
Copies Trump 
And tries to silence truth 
The story they want to refute 
Exopses sexual assault 
Of Palestinians 
By Israeli troops. 
I doubt they published that 
Without proof. 

A plane was grounded by bluetooth 
As a practical joker 
Named his speaker  
Bomb 

Southampton’s chances are gone 
After scandalously spying upon 
Their Playoff opposition 
An increase of collisions 
After shipping alterations 
Is threatening whale populations 
And extreme sport brings elation  
In Gloucestershire, as the cheese is rolled. 

Nasa puts its plans on hold 
When Bezzos Rocket ship explodes 
Disaster very clearly shows 
The moon’s back out of reach 

The Pope decides to preach 
The reasons why 
We all should hate A.I 
(I think I kinda like the guy) 
And Europe hits an all time high 
In Coitus based infections 
(That’s STI’s guys, use protection) 

Gamestop gets a quick rejection 
For ideas above its station, 
Bidding fifty-five billion 
To take over ebay 
The best in the world gather to play snooker 
And the title goes to China 
Crayola has a nightmare,  
There’s asbestos in their crayons 
And all the doping regulations 
Are gone 
For the steroid Olympics 

For the first time ever 
Healthy chicks 
Are hatched from artificial eggs 
A breakthrough which may, if it sticks 
Revive the dodo bird 

Musk is sounding more absurd 
Each and every single word 
He speaks, I’m not sure if you heard 
His Critique of Chris Nolan 
Apparently he’s “Anti-white” 
His Odyssey is woke as shite 
Because he didn’t cast it right… 
The bloody story’s fiction!!! 

The renters rights bill takes effect 
And France, at large is unimpressed 
Because their PM bought bagguettes 
From bakeries on May Day 
Fergie’s rushed to A&E 
The Pope says soz for slavery 
And amazon delivery  
Drones hit the UK 

Trump has a short stay in China 
As does Putin shortly after  
But it’s only Jinping’s laughter 
That resounds 
As negotiations fail to get of the ground 

Thailand is filled with the sound of Celebration 
At the discovery of the Nagatitan 
And police tighten 
Their belts in London 
As Tommy Robinson 
And Pro-Palestinian 
Protests contend. 
The world cup sees poor portends 
It’s not started, but already offends 
As Fifa set prices not even Trump can defend 
And May comes to a dramatic end  
On a once in a blue moon. 

Of Course I May Have Missed Something

Was there anything that you missed? Was there anything I missed and you think should have really been in there? Feel free to ask, share your thoughts, or reminisce with your comments.

Thank you for reading May 2026 – The News in Review. As with all poetry on my website, this piece is free to enjoy, however if you would like to thank me. Or want help make sure I can continue to write these news reviews. Please head over to my Ko-Fi. There you will be able to support me if you wish, either as a one off, or monthly. As well as purchase more of my poetry which is unavailable on this website.

And Of course, check back next month to read June’s Review. See if you can guess what it might contain.

May’s News in a Poetry Pamphlet!

May sees the return of the Daily Haikews Poetry pamphlet which features one poem per day based upon the news throughout the month. al poetry and artwork within are created by me. These panphlets are also avaliable on my  Ko-Fi.