June, The Month the Weather Went Mad
Welcome to the June edition of the News in Review poetry series. As always, I try to be as thorough as I can, but I can’t include everything, a lot happens in a month, and so there was far more to include than I had space to fit in this piece. But I have tried to include a balance of the good, the bad, the ugly, and the fun. June was hot! (In Europe at least, but I’m pretty sure for a lot of the rest of the world too.) And seemed to see a massive ammount of extreme weather across the globe, so I decided to dedicate a sizable chunk of the poem to a weather report to pay tribute to this chaos. Hopefully though, some of what follows will remind you that not everything is bad, even if June was starting to feel like the end of the world.
I will add a disclaimer that this piece was written by me; a British poet, and as such will be recording and commenting from news in a British perspective, which might mean some events you consider important from June 2026 are not included, and some things you have never heard of are more extensively covered.
It’s Still Bloody Hot
It’s bloody hot innit,
It’s still bloody hot!
Even hotter than last year
And I am starting to fear
That it’s all I’m gonna write about
The news will become nothing more
Than an un glorified weather report…
Don’t worry, it’s not gone that far yet.
But this is making it hard to forget
Global warming
For anyone whose not insane…
There have been heat records once again,
all across Europe.
It’s not just us that’s feeling it,
Spain and France were badly hit
The Gremans, Polish, and the Swiss
Plus Czechia, Hungary and Slovakia.
Daily, records shattered!
And it’s not just heat that’s battered
People this month either.
Since June is Typhoon season
In Japan and Indonesia
We had Wildfires in Derbyshire
And winds in Cornwall so severe
The Royal Cornwall show was cancelled
Which might not seem that bad….
But I was there… and there were scotch eggs to be had!
Earthquakes rattle Indonesia,
Poland, Greece and Venezuela,
China and the Phillipines as well.
Oh and did I say… The world’s as hot as Hell!
That’s all the weather that I have for now…
I’m sure July will burn us more as well…
In other news!
Starmer’s final U-Turn
Sees him out of office
And Streeting’s stepped off his
Soap box and is refusing to run
Against Andy Burnham
The race is closing,
As Rayner has chosen
Not to stand
Looks like Andy
Will be the man we
Have in downing street
As the competition folds
All mouth and no balls.
Lets hope he’s stopped
being a Blairite asshole
Once all the rigmarole
Is finalized
Iran has been sterilised…
If you believe Trump
Don’t…
And the Supreme Leder
Says he’s achieved a
Victory..
They finally sign a peace Treaty
which will obviously last eternally,
As long as Israel agree
To pull out of Lebanon…
Nope… that’s a refusal yet again…
Thankfully the treaty still stands…
For now….
More on that next month…
With all the heat, you’d think we might get bored
Of constant, ever-growing wars,
But no, it seems we just want more!
With research showing conflicts soar
to reach their highest rate
Since 1945.
I’d tell you who they all were,
But we don’t have time…
So we’ll put the doom and gloom aside
To head towards the main event of June
(And of July…)
A sporting event no one can deny
Has had some impact on us all
As the world stops to revove around a ball
At wimbledon…
Yes, the tennis is back again
But overshadowed by another event…
The World Cup
For which Scotland Qualified
But couldn’t hit their stride
And missed the knockout stage.
Messi made the front page
As the first Person to have played
In six word cups just days
Before Ronaldo
His gory didn’t stop there though
And he went on to score more goals
than anyone in history.
Heartbreak for Gremany
As Paraguay claim victory
With the biggest upset ever
The Netherlands can’t hold it together
As Morocco knock them out.
And there’s plenty of scandal about
When visas get revoked.
Then that VAR bloke
Accidentally made obscene
Hand gestures whilst on screen.
Ebola’s still making a scene in Africa
As US quarentine sites in Kenya
Are blocked by the courts,
And France reports
The first case in Europe
The 52nd G7 summit
Is held in Evian,
the first place to ever have
the conference more than once
Toyota win the 24 hour Le Mans
And Gen AI is completely gone
From primary schools in Norway
The goverment there paves the way
In banning harmful tools,
Perhaps we should follow suit,
Instead of making awkward rules
About social media.
I get that kids aren’t safe there,
But how can you police it?
Pope Leo proves a big hit
On his trip to Barcelona
Where he blessed the Basilica
Sagrada Familia’s
Central tower
A hunderd years after
Gaudi’s death.
Cuba is left bereft
As American sanctions
Force hotel corperations
To abandon resorts
Back to sports,
The New York Knicks win the NBA
And fans get carried away
In the after party,
Taking a leaf from PSG’s
Riot infused Crazy.
Trump hosts a special UFC
Bout at the White House,
An American Birthday Celebration
For an unimpressed Nation
When all his grander plans fell through
Elephant seals are killed by bird flu
As Australia gets a new strain through,
Just as vaccines get approved
In South Africa
There’s an outbreak of Cholera
In Sudan
And Measels back by unpopular demand
In the US
But at least they didn’t get meningitus…
Like Kent…
Bloody Kent…
Florida sues Chat GPT
For putting profits over safety
The new leadership of Hungary
Wants Ukraine in Europe
Two arrests made in Turkey
For stealing archaeology
Whilst China bans kiwi MPs
For visiting Taiwan
Space X shares go up for sale
Now Musk’s a Trillion dollar whale
Someonw throw his ass in Jail
For having too much cash
Or put him in Allegator Alcatraz
And leave him to rot as it closes.
Colombia proposes
A ban on FGM
The first Latin American
Country to protect women
From mutilation
And riots over immigration
Sweep through the UK
Spurred on by an “array”
Two…
Attacks by non-white men.
And Henry Nowak’s body cam
Made people call police Racist…
Against whiteness
Once again it was his highness
The king of England’s birthday
So the honours list was back,
Horray!
And prominently featured half the squad
Of England’s Lionessess
After Euro 2025 sucsessess
Two fantstic authoressess
Julia Donaldson and Malorie Blackman
As well as the bosses at Ardman.
Cerys Matthews,
Aneka Rice,
And Already a Dame, Helen Mirram
(I didn’t know you could be knighted twice…)
But if anyone deserves it
She’s probably the right choice.
Still, celebrations fade
To war’s constant noise.
Ukraine deploys
a forty day campaign
Missiles thud again and again
Into Moscow
Putin complains at how
They hit civilian buildings
Though it seemed to thrill him
When tables were reversed
A new UN report finds
More Israeli war crimes
With proof they aimed for children
Purposefully
When striking Hamas’ Infantry
But Hamas, though provoked constantly
Say they are ready
To stand down.
There is some joy to be found,
As Flamingoes once again abound
In Turkish Lake Tuz
After five years of fears
That they never would again
Perhapse the world’s not quite yet gone to pot…
But still, it’s really
Really
Really
Really
Really
Really
Really Hot.
Is This the June You Remember?
Was there anything that you missed? Was there anything I missed and you think should have really been in there? Feel free to ask, share your thoughts, or reminisce with your comments.
Thank you for reading June 2026 – The News in Review. As with all poetry on my website, this piece is free to enjoy, however if you would like to thank me. Or want help make sure I can continue to write these news reviews. Please head over to my Ko-Fi. There you will be able to support me if you wish, either as a one off, or monthly. As well as purchase more of my poetry which is unavailable on this website.
And Of course, check back next month to read July’s Review. See if you can guess what it might contain.
Happy Birthday To the News in Review
June 2026 marks one year since I started writing the news in review, and as such I have begun to add the archive of news pieces to my site. Be sure to check them out!